This Full Moon cycle asks a vital question. How present are you for what you feel and need? Now that may seem like a no brainer for people, yet it’s trickier than you may imagine. This Moon Cycle pulls the curtain back on how we learned to see and act on our own needs, thanks to Venus opposing the Moon. Some learned in childhood that needs and desires were vulnerabilities that leave you open to dangerous invasions. Others learned how to leverage the needs and desires of another to get your wants and needs met.
The Moon hangs out with Chiron, so we have traveled far enough to see the patient on the operating table is us. We simply cannot create better than what you see in today’s world without an upgrade on how we interact with each other. Yet those exchanges are limited by our internal state of being. If denying your needs was a sign of strength, you aren’t very likely to be open when there is an offer to meet them. Instead you may well view it with hostility and suspicion. If you learned that the only way to succeed is to be better at reading and leveraging others, then transactional exchanges are your limit. The world is reduced to winners and losers.
It is time to ask, “What do I feel and what does that feeling require? We have a world of options, an almost staggering proportion of ways to meet our needs today. But it all begins with that first inquiry. You have to ask yourself an honest question to get an honest answer. The Gottman institute determined a formula based on exhaustive data to predict a couple’s ability to successfully stay together or not with over 90% accuracy. It was based on the positive to negative interactions between them. The couple who succeed have a 20 positive to 1 negative ratio of interactions. Those with 5 positive to 1 negative were in divorce court quickly. Now here’s the thought. Start with that ratio in your head. Do you have 20 positive interactions with yourself to the negative?
Don’t worry if you cringed on that one, most of us do. But the next very telling ingredient was the ability to ‘turn towards’ the partner when they asked for attention. Now imagine your wants and needs as a partner. Do you know how to ‘turn to’ and acknowledge what you want and need? I’m not talking about consuming a whole chocolate cake or blowing off work to go surfing. I’m talking about looking at what you want, underneath the conditioning. Not the cosmetically approved want. No the real desire you learned to bury under ‘acceptable’ appearances. Can you have that hard conversation with yourself, get up close with what really drives you?
The next two weeks offers exciting new ground around what you desire and how you achieve it. Since Saturn and Mars are in harmony, we can take actions that better serve us now. We can peel back the layers of programming to the original feelings. But the shadow side is not pretty. Manipulation and power struggles can show up, because our wounded self wants the people around us now to pay for the parenting we didn’t get. Needless to say, that’s not likely to turn out well. It’s definitely not sustainable behavior. It requires to redesign how you meet an honest need in a way that sustainable. That’s only possible when the old wounds are addressed within you first. So find your own hard conversations, but with compassion for the young you. The Cards and Stars will help.
Thank you,
Lisa Greenfield
TruthinHand.com
10/9 full aries moon king of cups
This Full Moon is loaded with celestial input. It also ushers in a very busy couple of weeks with planets going direct and heavy weight planets squaring off. Your eyes would glaze over to list the aspects, so like this sweet King of Cups, let me wave a wand and simplify things. This King is our masculine ability to make things happen in life, accomplish tasks. The feminine ability to receive input at a high level for fertile transformation is represented by the cups. When masculine and feminine get together, sometimes one plus one equals three. Therefore this card represents the magic that goes beyond linear explanations.
Over the next couple of weeks, challenges that cross your path ARE opportunities. This is not to dismiss the distress an obstacle may hold for you. Rather it’s to give you a bigger perspective so the adult you can have a conversation with the young you that knows things will turn out better than expected. Our fear always overestimates the threat and underestimates us. So use the fear to locate our expansion potential and then have those difficult discussions. For me one such conversation uncovered that I avoided journaling because the young me resented having to do one more thing to perform. I was sick of being a good girl.
While I know writing improves my emotional awareness and intelligence, my young self felt bullied to hit yet another standard. As soon as I honored and listened to the complaint, it quieted down. So often our pain just needs a witness. Be that for yourself first. I wanted to write out my discontent and let it be seen. Then it actually made me mad that an appointment came up so fast and I had to end my written complaint session. The uncovered was resentment was free, the desire was to be acceptable as I was had space, too. I promised myself I wouldn’t force journaling until I wanted to do it. And then as if by magic, I really did want to journal.
Let the magic come out of uncomfortable spaces. It may well be that others provide the obstacle or trigger. They are the means to have a deeper dive on the young you. What do you feel and what does that feeling need? Ask and stay with it until the real answer comes through. There may be shame and judgement that come up from your wounded childish places. Can you look yourself in the eye at whatever age shows up and be the loving mother that accepts whatever you feel? With Saturn in easy aspect to this Moon, you’ll get the hard work done, too. Start with kindness and patience for young you and these sticky conversations. It will build self trust. From there the sky is the limit, one choice at a time.
10/10 four of pentacles
The cards have their best face and their shadow, because they are our mirrors. The shadow side of this Four is greed and a need to adjust ones behavior. Venus is exactly opposite the Moon today. This makes it a good day to investigate the rationalizations we landed on to justify meeting our needs and wants in unhealthy ways. This is where we offend others from our own wounded space and justify hurting others because we were hurt. The Moon squares off with Pluto to remind us that power plays are a win/lose dynamic. You can’t improve a situation if you are still trying to even scores from games long gone.
We have to be present to the childish impulses in us to protect ourselves in a race to the bottom. That’s the story where they hurt me so I am not going to give them what they want. No one wins in this scenario, it’s a downward spiral with each one holding back more and more or positioning to get more without giving too much of themselves. Find a way you can voice a vulnerable ask instead of an angry complaint. Even if it is only to yourself for now. Commit to learning how to speak up for yourself in ways that preserve the dignity of all sides. Be willing to remember that you may be dealing with someone else’s young self, not a powerful adult that threatens you. If you can do that even once, you are on track for some serious gains. Try it.
10/11 princess of cups
Creativity requires flexibility and not hard lines. That goes for creative thinking as well as art. Changeability is the rule of today. Don’t be surprised if you find unexpected pockets of emotion popping up, whether they’re conveniently timed or not. We need to let what we feel into our lives, like colors in a crayon box. The goal is to then use them where they add to the view, rather than destroy property. Play with the broader range of emotions. Play is the operative word. Find the humor in what is in front of you. Even the darkest situations have moments of humor in them. What makes you laugh with yourself as you learn and live your one enchanting life? Let the beauty of a more complex you be a happy surprise today.
10/12 magician
The Taurus Moon gets a good morning kiss from dreamy Neptune before heading into a high five with Pluto. There are some good insights available today that turn old scary stories into today’s bonus. Like lead turning into gold, the Magician helps apply new interpretations to anything that happens. Those insights make it more fun to be present and powerful, rather than fearful or scheming. You can apply the magic wand to whatever crosses your path today. Set yourself a challenge. See how much you can take a situation and with a little of your own brand of alchemy make it more than you thought you ever could. Go ahead, discover your inner Magician. I dare you…
10/13 king of wands
Today’s aspects set the stage for transformational tension. This far sighted King can be impatient because it knows that the seemingly impossible can happen. Yet change takes longer in the body than it does in Spirit. Spirit doesn’t know time, so it sees everything as now. Except that when you want change to last, there are an awful lot of cells to enlist, just in your body. Uranus is in an uncomfortable relationship with Venus, our desire nature. So it make poke and provoke shifts in awkward ways.
In other words the Great Awakener, Uranus, may offer quite the gymnastic twist to show us how flexible we can be. Give yourself credit for whatever stretch you make today. As in the Gottman study, turn towards any of your efforts, even if there is still much to be done. Honor the desires, honor the effort to give them room within you. The more you practice doing that, the more your brain embeds the habit of being in good relationship with you. Not only does that feel better inside your skin, it attracts others, drawn by the light of your positive relationship energy. The goodness can’t help but burn brightly.
10/14 six of cups
We have a grand trine in Air which simply means our mind can work in harmony with us today. This Six of Cups and that trine make me think of a fresh snowfall. When you want to go sledding, fresh snow gives you multiple avenues to sail down the hill. Instead of the old, grooved paths, new vistas beckon you. When you know what you want, bring an innocence to the fulfillment of that desire. If you didn’t know all the ways it could go wrong, what would you want to create?
Now the sticky part is when you head in that direction and find snags or blockages. Turn towards yourself again. Honor your frustration or fears. Give them space to really express themselves within you. Then ask your brain to bring ingenuity to the situation. How can the wind resistance become what lifts you airborne? Keep reaching for a beginner’s mind instead of the pain of past disappointments. Good. Let that become a tool you reach for over and over again. It can become your new normal. How good does that feel, right?
10/15 five of pentacles
The Moon feels challenged today. This Five of Pentacles sheds a little light on how those struggles can benefit you. This card has to do with scarcity mentality. This is where we think if one person wins, succeeds or gains something there is less for everyone else. We forget that what is ours is meant to be ours. We can’t lose it. But boy can we talk ourselves into a state when someone else gets the job, the relationship, the house or recognition we want and don’t have yet. The key word there is yet.
Plus, we often box ourselves in with too many specifics on what our ‘win’ has to look like. We didn’t learn how to look at someone who achieved what we want and think, I want MY version of that. Brain biology is hard wired to believe what we see, so when we know it’s possible, that’s a good thing. But fear wants to talk you out of expanding into the unknown. So it will convince you that there isn’t enough for you. I call that the Compare and Despair. Yet we are hardwired to Compare and Dare to have our own version of it.
Turn towards the part of you that learned from others that there isn’t enough for you. Honor those fears and then bookend it. Insist that your brain include the possibility that you can have what you see or better. Have the hard conversation with you that may want to take it from another or wish them pain to equal what you feel at losing out. Just giving those feelings honest space reduces their intensity. This way they can no longer color your actions as much as when they are shamefully repressed. Feeling it is not the same as acting on it. Learn to acknowledge the emotion and then make a better choice of how to act in service of achieving your dreams.
10/16 three of swords
Sticky aspects in the morning stir up some poor me thoughts, but then we move into the evening and taste the freedom of the Uranian Great Awakening. An angry complaint or a poor me is an opportunity for a vulnerable ask. First you have to acknowledge any pattern that doesn’t see your full power to make that ask. The disempowered view from your past that gives birth to the resentment or self pity needs your attention before you move into what you actually want.
One meaning for this card is tears and sorrow. What we lost, including our innocence, deserves a few tears. Only when we honor a full range of emotions can enjoy our authentic self. The difference is now you don’t get stuck playing the same story over and over. Your feelings actually flesh out the map of who you are and then you sculpt them with your actions. Being brave makes mountain ranges that stand tall. Applying compassion fills lakes and streams. Grieving what was lost is a kindness that waters the whole landscape. So give yourself the time to see what was lost, grieve it and then ask for what you know you want now. Sounds simple, but there is much packed into those few steps.
10/17 the hermit
This wise old man stands with the light to help guide all who follow. The story goes the lamp is lit by inner reflections that go on to shine for others to see. The celestial stew is chock full, which provides plenty of emotional turbulence to play with and investigate. Why do we give what we do and do we give it to those who see and appreciate it or pour it out in wasted spaces? Those spaces can be people who don’t value it or it can be that you are giving what is unwelcome or unneeded in their opinion. Again, are you giving to get or have you tuned in to offer what they want or need in their own opinion?
It is worth discovering whether you offer or receive from clean space or whether you learned transactional exchange. Don’t worry if you discover it is the later. Almost everyone starts there. The goal is to get beyond the starting point. Turn the light inward. Find our where scarcity mentality colors your flow with people. Yesterday’s Three of Swords with the previous day’s Five of Pentacles can also say break up with beliefs that don’t trust there is enough for you to have what is meant to be yours. That may not be everything you want, but it will certainly be everything you need.
10/18 the moon
The Moon’s job is to teach us to trust the cycles of life, from light to dark and back to light again. It highlights instinctive knowledge and intuitive guidance. The Hermit also speaks to trust of yourself and that inner guidance. You get a double message that your wise self knows better than your fearful mind. We have a lot of spacious thinking available today thanks to a Venus trine Mars in Gemini and a Leo Moon sextile Mercury in Libra. All that air and fire can brighten the day and inspire us. Some ideas may make more sense than others. Feel your way. What is the thought that makes you feel most alive. Good to know, right? Inner guidance may take us in unexpected directions. Hold those possibilities and look for more intuitive signs along the way to follow. Then just enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!
10/19 the emperor
Ah, now today it’s a matter of taking the inspiration of yesterday and learning more about your creative process. What happens when you hit obstacles, or when power struggles emerge? Can you stay present and curious to your stories? If you begin with that challenge, you may actually find yourself able to stay present when someone triggers you. If you can’t then consider it a learning curve, apply the lessons and move forward. The Emperor applies logic and rules from a place of entitlement in the shadow. If you want to draw on the strength in this card, it gives you a solid backbone to trust your inner knowing. Using your intuition and heart as a compass the Emperor gives you the wheel to steer in the direction those two point you. See how your version of that looks.
10/20 the fool
This is the fourth Major Arcana card in a row. Are you starting to feel the impact of the little things you do yet? Those hard conversations in your head, tuning in and turning towards your needs, trusting your own inner guidance make a major difference. Yet they add up little by little throughout each day. We have an easy calendar of aspects today to help us ground and settle some pretty important shifts that happened this past few days. Why not take a moment and put your hand on your belly. Breathe, give it some gratitude. Our instinctive self is wiser than we were taught to know. It is what turns life into a daring adventure and it came with you at birth. Feel yours. It may make it easier to include it in whatever comes next.
10/21 queen of wands
The Moon meets up with Uranus again today to peel back more layers of self doubt and outsized fears. This fiery Queen has magnetic appeal and reminds us that the light in us is what draws others to us. No matter how much darkness we’ve endured, it still gave birth to what came out of that primal soup. Like a baby unseen in the dark womb, all your lived experiences formed into a whole you. Fire requires fuel, and that fuel is praise, applause, recognition and respect. Your opportunity today is refuel your fire. Go give yourself a high five in the mirror. Give yourself a compliment or two, or three. That’s not egotistical or needy, it’s practicality. A fire needs fuel to burn brightly. Stoke the fire in you today.
10/22 princess of wands
After the empowerment of yesterday we meet up with an active sky, aspects challenging us to grow, change, adjust today. This princess is the reminder that our inner state shapes our outer state. So tend the self talk today. Remember the fuel from yesterday. Well the challenge today is to use it. Believe in yourself. Results that aren’t what you hoped are still good information. We learn as we go. Mistakes build the bank account of wisdom. So learn from what works and what doesn’t work today. Let what you don’t like help illustrate what you do. Believe in yourself, it’s worth repeating. You don’t know how it will turn out, most likely better than you expect. So your job is trust yourself, learn as you go and stay open and curious to YOU.
10/23 Justice
Balance, balance, balance says this card. We have both the Sun and Venus moving into Scorpio in a tense aspect with Retrograde Jupiter. Which usually means that what you notice first is what is out of balance. Power dynamics, power struggles and territory disputes offer insight. Once again, what did you learn about how to use power? Time to face some uncomfortable truths about it. Very few people and I mean very few, have learned how to fairly use power. In fact the best examples are people who become empowered because of a principle or dedication that gathered others admiration and alignment.
Nelson Mandela is one example. He was by no means perfect. But he was a man who rose above personal circumstances to improve the circumstances for those around him. Those who work best with that kind of influence are those who don’t specifically seek it. But false humility is just as blind as power hungry efforts. When you are aligned with what you love and want to do in this world, your power is automatic and appropriate for your world. Take a good look at your blueprint and give it a good clean up. It will actually accumulate more natural authority than seeking it will ever give you.
10/24 prince of wands
This rounds out the court cards for the Wands/Fire/Intuition suit this Moon cycle. We now have Princess, Prince, Queen and King. What this points to is your intuitive self, yet again. This is the bravest of all the Knights. Which is appropriate given that being able to follow. your inner guidance may fly in the face of norms and logic. Christopher Columbus went left when everyone else was going right to get to the West Indies. In doing so he discovered a whole New World. (And he behaved atrociously in it, but that’s another post). Courage not fueled by ego is the goal.
Ego has you spitting in the wind instead of bravely facing what’s ahead of you and learning as you go. With a little humility and humor you can discover your own New Worlds. But there is no doubt it takes courage as well. What does being brave look like on you? Do you know the places and spaces where you’ve already shown the world that side of you? Take a moment today and get better acquainted with your brand of courage. See it and appreciate it in exactly the way you live. If you notice you want to access more of it, great! Have some fun and play with being brave so that it feels just right for you.
